Nothing - Something - Everything

2007-04-15T04:36:00.000-07:00

The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes

I made a big decision a little while ago.

I don't remember what it was, which prob'ly goes to show

That many times a simple choice can prove to be essential

Even though it often might appear inconsequential.

I must have been distracted when I left my home because

Left or right I'm sure I went. (I wonder which it was!)

Anyway, I never veered: I walked in that direction

Utterly absorbed, it seems, in quiet introspection.

For no reason I can think of, I've wandered far astray.

And that is how I got to where I find myself today.

Explorers are we, intrepid and bold,

Out in the wild, amongst wonders untold.

Equipped wit our wits, a map, and a snack,

We're searching for fun and we're on the right track!

My mother has eyes on the back of her head!

I don't quite believe it, but that's what she said.

She explained that she'd been so uniquely endowed

To catch me when I did Things Not Allowed.

I think she must also have eyes on her rear.

I've noticed her hindsight is usually clear.

At night my mind does not much care

If what it thinks is here or there.

It tells me stories it invents

And makes up things that don't make sense.

I don't know why it does this stuff.

The real world seems quite weird enough.

What if my bones were in a museum,

Where aliens paid good money to see 'em?

And suppose that they'd put me together all wrong,

Sticking bones on to bones where they didn't belong!

Imagine phalanges, pelvis, and spine

Welded to mandibles that once had been mine!

With each misassemblage, the error compounded,

The aliens would draw back in terror, astounded!

Their textbooks would show me in grim illustration,

The most hideous thing ever seen in creation!

The museum would commission a model in plaster

Of ME, to be called, "Evolution's Disaster"!

And paleontologists there would debate

Dozens of theories to help postulate

How man survived for those thousands of years

With teeth-covered arms growing out of his ears!

Oh, I hope that I'm never in such manner displayed,

No matter HOW much to see me the aliens paid.

I did not want to go with them.

Alas, I had no choice.

This was made quite clear to me

In threat'ning tones of voice.

I protested mightily

And scrambled 'cross the floor.

But though I grabbed the furniture,

they dragged me out of the door.

In the car, I screamed and moaned.

I cried my red eyes dry.

The window down, I yelled for help

To people we passed by.

Mom and Dad can make the rules

And certain things forbid,

But I can make them wish that they

Had never had a kid.

Now I'm in bed,

The sheets pulled to my head.

My tiger is here making Zs.

He's furry and hot.

He takes up a lot

Of the bed and he's hogging the breeze.

2007-04-15T04:23:00.000-07:00

Ascent of the East

PURVODAYA, the first national level conclave hosted by any IIT, took place on the 7^th and 8^th of April at IIT Kharagpur. The conclave was conceived by the Vinod Gupta School of Management (VGSOM), with the objective of providing ideas for the development of Eastern India, in partnership with the Steel Authority of India Limited, with Era Group and The Times of India as the associate partners.

The conclave was inaugurated by the Director of IIT Kharagpur, Prof S. K. Dube, with the director (Personnel) of SAIL, Mr. G. Ojha as the chief guest. The occasion was also graced by Prof. G S Sanyal, the “Bhishma Pitama” of IIT Kharagpur, who has been involved with IIT Kharagpur since its very inception.

During the 2 day conclave several luminaries representing the government and the industry spoke on diverse subjects, from Mining and Manufacturing to the challenges faced in developing the Services Sector in Eastern India. These included Mr. Sethuraman Sivaram, Director, Deloitte,Mr. B D Mundhra, Chairman and Managing Director, Simplex Infrastructure limited, Prof. Prakash Apte, Director, IIM Bangalore, along with Mr Sunil Mitra, the Principal Secretary, Power, from the West Bengal government. These were some of the eminent personalities and experts who each delivered their vision of the future of Eastern India. The entire conclave was conceived and executed entirely by the students of Vinod Gupta School of Management in order to stimulate the ideas of the student community that is going to carry out the plans of today tomorrow.

During the discussion on MINING, a broad agreement was reached on the importance of keeping mining and the subsidiary manufacturing industries close to each other to create value, rather than merely exporting commodities. The quantum of the investment that was expected in the Eastern states was pointed out, with the commitments of both foreign and domestic investments in the mining industry being laid out. The ex-CEO of Mittal Steel Kazakhstan, Mr. N K Choudhary drew attention to the quality of ore deemed exploitable, and demanded higher efficiencies in ore extraction, along with utilization of a lower quality ore.

This was followed by the Panel Discussion “MANTHAN”, where Prof. Prakash Apte, Director IIM Bangalore pointed out the dichotomy of providing higher education subsidies while primary education across the country continues to languish. He recommended a market based solution to this problem, with opening up of the higher education sector, while providing targeted subsidies to primary education in the country, especially for rural India. Mr. Hota, ex-CMD of IDCO, mooted an ambitious plan to develop a coastal infrastructure of ports stretching from West Bengal to North Andhra Pradesh, which would be connected to the hinterlands of Orissa, Jharkhand and Bihar by speedy rail transportation. These would lead a paradigm shift in the evolution of Eastern India’s development.

The INFRASTRUCTURE SESSION saw Mr. Sunil Mitra, the Principal Secretary for Power from the West Bengal government outlining the power sector reforms that are currently proceeding apace. He pointed out the success of this programme, which has led to profits being generated by the Public Power Sector, as a perfect example of the Ascent of a resurgent east, which has gone almost unnoticed by either the media or general public. These efforts in public reforms are not given wide publicity, but are tremendously effective. The development of other social infrastructure, including the lack of adequate educational infrastructure was lamented, and a suggestion was made to set up more quality ITI’s where the workers that would drive India’s manufacturing sector could be trained.

The session on the growth of the SERVICE SECTOR was clearly dominated by the discussion on the differentiators that led to the emergence of Eastern India, and Kolkata as an alternative for the major companies to set up offices there. A point was made about the lower cost of land and quality labour, with institutes such as ISI and Jadavpur University, but the future availability of talent was again noted with concern.

The session on SUSTAINABLE DEVELOPMENT also pointed out the need to bring the fruits of development down to every individual, while at the same time, ensuring that this security could be ensured for the coming generations as well.

In Parallel, there were also the case study and Paper Presentation on TOURISM DEVELOPMENT as well as LAND ACQUISITION POLICY. Innovative plans and solutions were given by students from all over the country over these emerging sectors and challenges.

In his concluding speech, Prof. Probir K Gupta, Dean of the Vinod Gupta School of Management summarised the conclusions of the conclave, with a special emphasis on the need for inclusive development, and the need for every individual to draw upon his or her skills to make their own dreams come true to bring development to the east. It is this expression of individual desire that will bring Purvodaya, a new dawn indeed for Eastern India.

2007-04-01T16:02:00.000-07:00

'PURVODAYA'

National Conclave @ VGSOM

With rich natural resources, an ample and able talent pool and carefully engineered industrialization, Eastern India stands poised to take its place as an economic hub.

Vinod Gupta School of Management, IIT Kharagpur, has conceived a platform where policy-makers, corporate doyens, academicians and the student community can bring this grand vision to fruition.

PURVODAYA - National Conclave is where both the opportunities and obstacles that line this path can be explored.

While economic growth is important, it is imperative that the development process is all-inclusive and the spin-offs of the process trickle down to all sections of society. Several issues like striking a balance between agrarian and industrial interests, SEZs, need to be explored and debated to enable informed decision-making. It is such strategic, social and geo-political issues related to the development process that will be set before the galaxy of distinguished speakers at PURVODAYA.

The conclave would encompass vital sectors, which would play a prominent role in "Ascent of the East". The program is divided into four sub-themes each focusing on a key area namely Mining & Manufacturing, Infrastructure, Service Industry and Sustainable Growth along with Manthan – The Panel Discussion.

Speakers who have confirmed participation (till date) include dignitaries like:

1. Mr. Sunil Mitra
• Principal Secretary, Power, West Bengal Government

2. Mr. Ashim Burman
• Chairman, Damodar Valley Corporation (DVC)

3. Mr. Debashish Som
• Managing Director, WBIDC (West Bengal Infrastructure Development Corporation)

4. Mr. G. Ojha
• Director Personnel, SAIL

5. Mr. Vivekananda Pattanayak, IAS (Retd)
• Ex- Chairman, Orrisa Public Service Commission, presently Head Bhubaneswar Stock
Exchange

6. Mr. R Srinivasan, Board member, ITC.

7. Mr. Prakash Apte, Director, IIMB.

8. MR B.D. MUNDHRA , Chairman and Managing Director, Simplex Infrastructures Ltd

9. Dr. A. K. Chanda, Chairman Calcutta Port Trust

10. Senior Speakers from
• IBM
• Development for International Development (DFID), UK
• Senior Partner from Price Waterhouse Coopers (PWC)
• One more speaker from ITC.

In addition, the event also includes a challenging competition for students across the nations. Titled SARVUNNATI it aims to bring together the future leaders from different B-schools across the country to present their innovative ideas on various issues of the resurgent east.

PURVODAYA, we hope, will generate ideas that will leave their impression on the "sands of time" and give solution to those outstanding issues that act as roadblocks to the growth of the East.

PURVODAYA welcomes you to shape and share its vision for the Ascent of the East.

To know more about the event click here.

2006-12-21T11:14:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays !

As much as I want to wish each one of u a Merry Christmas and a Happy New year, I want to share the news of the new Google Doodle being out !

In case u haven't noticed, Google's released its latest Doodle - dis time for Holidays!

Just chk d google website or better look below :P

The legacy of Doodles goes a long way back and if u have never payed attention u have missed out one of the best examples of sheer creativity!

Chk out dis link for d entire list of Doodles -

http://www.google.com/holidaylogos.html

Happy doodling!

2006-12-21T10:45:00.000-08:00

Perspective !

Nothing can better exemplify "Perspective" per se, than this quotation by Jeffrey Archer !

"I was allowed to ring the bell for five minutes before everyone was in assembly. That was the beginning of power"

- On his school days, in the Daily Telegraph 16 March , 1988.

I never knew 'perspective' could be such a powerful thing !!!

2006-12-21T09:24:00.000-08:00

U Got Chocolates !!!

Nope m not askin u 2 mail me some chocs........dere's loads of dem dis side!

The above refers to a silly incident in hostel. I was called upon by a grp of close friends to be given some GYAAN. Actually it was more of a word of caution than just plain gyaan. I was being instructed to be extremely careful while i am doin my summer training - a first stint as an MBA graduate in the corporate world !

Eventhough I have already seen the ways and means of the corpo world for more than a year before getting back to college for a masters degree, I just can't leave the kid inside me. People say that is a good thing. But in my case that goes a tad beyond normal !

Sounds like Peter Pan eh!

Well that is precisely the case. Dunno why?

Before I begin digressing..............the incident.

After the Gyaan session ended; with loads of instructions on being careful about backstabbers and the associated filth that happens; some general talk was going on. It was then that one of my best friends in that grp revealed he had some choclates in his room.

And I dunno why but I simply shouted out "U Got chocolates !!!" in the most ecstatic manner u can imagine; with the brightest possible glint in my eyes, wide open like a cat's in the dark! I don't knw wat made me so happy. Maybe the fact that I was being instructed like a mom instructs her kid - look left, then luk right and then cross the road, that too only on a zebra crossing ! The whole atmosphere was so much like that.......it was so comforting......so reassuring......so clean n pure.....

I was the kid ...........with extremely wonderful friends who had called me upon coz they only thought gud for me..........coz they wanted me to be careful............coz they were genuinely 'Concerned' !

Now tell me..........when u r constantly treated like this.......... Why should u grow up? or better

Why do u need to grow up ?!?!

:) :) :) :) :)

P.S. That "U Got Chocolates" has stuck to me now forever since then, infact I have to repeat it with the exact same expression everytime I have to dig out some chocs 4m dis friend of mine!

N i luv doin it!

2006-12-15T10:42:00.000-08:00

Direct vs Creative Advertising

Why David Ogilvy sided with the former?

Here's an exerpt from a speech the advertising genius gave to the advertising fraternity in Paris, expressing his opinion as to why direct advertising is more effective than creative advertising!

“There is a yawning chasm between you generalists and we directs. We directs belong to a different world. Your gods are not our gods."

“You generalists pride yourselves on being creative – whatever that awful word means. You cultivate the mystique of creativity. Some of you are pretentious poseurs. You are the glamour boys and girls of the advertising community. You regard advertising as an art form – and expect your clients to finance expressions of your genius. We directs do not regard advertising as an art form. Our clients don’t give a damn whether we win awards at Cannes. They pay us to sell their products. Nothing else."

“You must be the most seductive salesmen in the world if you can persuade hard headed clients to pay for your kind of advertising. When sales go up, you claim credit for it. When sales go down, you blame the product. We in direct response know exactly to the penny how many products we sell with each of our advertisements. Your favourite music is the applause of your fellow art directors and copywriters. Our favourite music is the ring of the cash register."

"You generalists use short copy. We use long copy. Experience has taught us that short copy doesn’t sell. In our headlines, we promise the consumer a benefit. You generalists don’t think it is creative."

"You have never had to live with the discipline of knowing the results of your advertising. We pack our advertisements and letters with information about the product. We have found out we have to – if we want to sell anything.”

How true !!!

2006-12-11T12:16:00.000-08:00

A Prof speaking English in class

* Inside the Class: Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come in.

* To a boy, angrily: I talk, he talk, why you middle middle talk?

* Shhhh........ Keep Quiet, The Principal is revolving the college.

* Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come in.

* You, meet me behind the class. (Meaning AFTER the class)...

* Both of u three get out of the class.

* Cut an apple into two halves - take the bigger half.

* Shhh...Quiet, boys...the principal just passed away in the corridor

* Close the doors of the windows please... I have winter in my nose today...

* Take a Copper Wire of any metal...

* About his family: I have two daughters. Both of them are girls...

* At the ground :* All of you stand in a straight circle.* There is no wind in the balloon.

* Giving a punishment:
You, rotate the ground four times...
You go and under-stand the tree...
You three of you, stand together separately...
Why are you late - say YES or NO.

* Hang this chart here or I will hang myself

* Keep quiet else I will lose your marks

Plzz use the COMMENTS section generously and add all dat u can remember from ur Gud old Collg days........

Cheers :)

2006-10-05T06:23:00.000-07:00

COURSE KITNA HUA YAAAAAR???

Hmm dats d WEBDINGS font.......

Wat does dat mean?

"Course kitna hua yaaaar?"

Why dat ridiculous font?

Coz dats how everything in the exam syllabus looks like when u have reached ur

"Saturation Threshold"

It wouldn't have taken a split second for anyone who's been to a college, esp. hostelites, to relate to the topic of this write-up!

The "Omnipresent Question", be it said or unsaid, reflecting conspicuously on each n every face....

Stacks of books on the study table, almost ready to give the Eiffel Tower gud enough competition.....

Sleepless faces roaming around like zombies.......

Helpless brains trying to make a FINAL PRIORITY LIST..........

Forecasting with some much needed assistance from Previous Years' Question papers....

Pinning the last hopes on these and finally on GOD!

But yes.........some people do let out that FRUSTRATION in a much more humorous fashion.......to d respite of many more around them..........

One way out is to pen it down in the form of SHAYARI..........

Here go some REAL LIFE compositions............Impromptu to the Core!

Dhoop me niklo, ghatao me nahakar dekho

Zindagi kya hai, KITABO ko hatakar dekho

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vaah....

Kitaabein hataake kal imtehaaan deke to dekho

Zindagi kya hai....

Voh apni-apni marksheets mein dekho....!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

N here comes the ever optimistic SYMPATHIZER.........

Do not wory junta!

"Na har me na jeet me,

kinchit nahi bhaybhit maisangharsh path per jo mila,

yeh bhi sahi wah bhi sahi"...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Na yeh mila na woh mila........

Ab tak to saala kuch nahin mila............

Bhaybhit to tab ho insaan jab khone ka ho bhay man mein

Na har hai na jeet haiyeh to pass hone ki need hai....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aaina dekh kar tasalli huyi,humko is ghar me jaanta hai koi !!!!

~~ GULZAR

D Reply-

Tumahara sher dekh kar tassalli hui.. ....

Hamaare allawaa bhi time waste kar raha hai koi....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yahan ka to alam aisa lagta hai ki.........

Aajkal din kuch aise gujaarte hain

Sabhi kitabo se sar nahi uthate hain kabhi!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Din to kuch khaas hai

Vela time aapke paas hai...

Dost ab shayari band kar dete hai........

Aur padai mein thoda dyaan laga lete hai...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Unki aankhon me neend kahan ,

jo dhun ke matwale haingati ki trisha aur badhti,

jab padte pairon me chale hain.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kabtak tu paper mein sar khapayega,

kal bhi ghissu tha,

kal fir ghissu kehlayega

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bored of studying book n slides...

Khada hun aaj bhi roti ke char harf liye

sawaal hai ke KITABOn ne kya diya mujhko
*harf = alphabets (R,O,T,I)

Reply -

Khada hoon aaj biblab ki slides liye

vgsom ne rattu tota bana diya mujhe

na igbo,na osd,na marketing padho yaron

bus mauj karo mauj karo,mauj karo.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

check out this!! movies n studies!! they gel sooo well!!

Exam == Kalyug,

Classes == Kabhi Kabhi

Viva == Encounter

Examination Hall == Chamber of Secret

Examiner == Mrityudata

Course == GodZilla

Paper Correction == Andha Kanoon

Exam Time == Qayamat se Qayamat Tak

Question Paper == Paheli

Answer Paper == Kora Kagaz

Marks == Ashambhav

Paper Out == Plan

Cheating == Aksar

Last Exam == Independence Day

Result == Sadma

Pass == Ajooba / Chamatkar

Fail == Devdas

Vacations == Masti

Supplementary == Aakhri Rasta

Any more contributions to the above list are MOST WELCOME!

I shall gladly make use of them in another such situtaion which is bound to arise sooner or later........

After all .............Xams will be Xams & Students will be Students!

2006-06-30T03:20:00.000-07:00

‘Women Soldiers’ – An Oxymoron in India?

“Would you have let me join the armed forces had I not had this slightly bad eyesight problem?”

I asked my father this question just after I watched “We the People’ on NDTV. The topic for discussion being ‘Is India’s military biased against women?’

The answer I got was a straight and blunt “Yes”
But if I know my father well, there was an underlying and very prominent tacit message – ‘I wouldn’t have let you give a 2nd thought to your decision.’
That is to say, “Do your homework first, as in self-introspection. If you promise to handle everything that is demanded from a woman soldier, go ahead. But don’t dare to insult the profession even in your dreams by regretting at any stage for having taken it up. Then you would be insulting your self, me, and your country.”

I had done my homework long back and that is why am not in the armed forces. Even though I have the mental stamina, I badly lack the physical strength required for being a part of the defense forces.

The debate has been ignited due to Army Vice Chief Lt. Gen. S. Pattabhiraman’s sexist remark – ‘Comfort level with women officers is low and the army can do without them’; followed by a suicide incident involving a woman officer.

The response included newspapers giving front page coverage to the issue, accompanying them with names in bold like – Rani Laxmibai of Jhansi, Joan of Arc, Razia Sultana, Rani Jhansi regiment of the INA, etc. all to prove that women have the metal in them to be a part of the military even in a combat role.

Following this was the emphasis on defining ‘COMBAT’ per se – you might be employed in any function in the military, there might not be access to basic facilities, you might have to share tents/blankets etc. with your counterparts (which include males), you might be captured by the enemy and in case of women, even sexually harassed, etc.

Thinking twice about such situations is what I meant by ‘Do your Homework’. The left side of my brain tells me that yes there are hurdles which in extreme cases might make a woman soldier look back at her decision. But then the right side adds, that is precisely why you need to promise yourself that you can face them. Only then you should go ahead and join the military. Don’t break the commitment.

The news channels have been flashing with debates, saying ‘The problem is with men and their mindset; which makes it difficult for them to accept a woman officer among their ranks.’

Another one said, ‘Women have grown, men need to grow up.’

Agreed.

But would add to that by saying, In the military,

‘If she can survive it all, Let her.
If she can’t and backtracks, Punish her’

Do your Homework girls, before falling for high-blown statements like ‘Breaking the glass ceiling’ and please don’t insult any profession.

Decide what you are made for!

2006-06-27T05:10:00.000-07:00

GavaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarS!!!

“U gavaaaaaaaaaaaaaaars doing whats???...........Have u booked d tickets of d trains or nots???...............Is it confirmed or in d waiting of d lists???........ YipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyS for d successfully planings of this trips………. Goings back to d best days of our lives”

?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
NO…………..this is not Javed Jafferey’s blog (Salaam Namaste fame)
It’s MINE

Read On………..

This lingo, which I christen as “GavaaaaaaaaarS”, was cooked up by a group of college pass outs, who in their desperate state of nostalgia decided to pay another visit to their Alma Mater. Yes, they are perfectly human coz this is what happens to people when they suffer from “Nostalgic Goosebumparia”

NOW………VENUE - Allahabad………TIME – June 3, 2006.

For the uninitiated, Allahabad at this time of year is an HHH – Hot, Humid Hellhole!!!
But “Come what may, the insane are gonna go their way”
Including me! [At least the ‘Read On…’ brought you till here………now be nice n Read On ……..]

:P

It took a month of planning to get things in place –

~ Working overtime before applying for leave so as not to give HARI SADU a chance to say “LEEEEeeeeeeeeeeave?!?!?!?” (Extra emphasis on “E”)

~ Soldiering questions from d over-concerned parents “Tum logon ko is se zyada garam jagah nahi mili thi jaane ko? Why d hell Allahabad?” (Our reply – “COLLEGE” with the world’s most gleefully joyous smile for added effect)

~ Digging out all those ‘LOST’ college photographs and associated memorabilia. Purpose - GOSSIP! After all, who’s going to sleep for these 2 days?

June 2, 2006 –

21:00 p.m.

Ah! Finally the day is here when we shall AGAIN board the same train – the umbilical cord b/w us and home for 4 years. We did; spent the whole night journey playing the ‘Most ridiculous SMS ever received’ game and consequently laughing as if we were the members of a laughter club; pissed off the other passengers in the process (without any regrets though :D) and in the morning patted ourselves yet again for successfully predicting the delay in arrival.

June 3, 2006 –

08:00 a.m.

What does a 5 yr old kid do when you give him not one but two lollypops?
Jump with joy!
That’s precisely what we did in spite of the fact that we were 17 years elder to that kid.
Reason – We were just 10 kilometer away from our Alma Mater.

Now as far as staying in Allahabad was concerned, we had another eccentrically genius idea – College Guesthouse!
We wanted to use each and every millisecond of our stay in college to the utmost. That’s why. Now, this place doesn’t have any kitchen; YES – No Kitchen in a GUEST-HOUSE!!! But the fact that we were INSIDE the college and getting an air-conditioned room with attached bathroom, the total size of which exceeds that of a 1 bedroom flat in Mumbai, at (Can you guess????? ) 150 bucks/day was good enough reason to go ahead with the idea.

The moment we reached the guest-house we were greeted by none other than ELECTRICITY CUT!!!
Ah! We should have predicted this also; another chance to pat ourselves on the back. What else could have freshened up our memories better if not – No Electricity. BUT, we were no longer students in the hostel; we were guests in a guest-house. Hence, no fear when the generator is here. We justifiably realized that we should have stayed in this guest-house all four years; after all what’s 150 bucks per day if you get an AC room with continuous electricity.
But, Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

How would we have justified not being able to study because of terrible summers and lack of electricity and protest for a postponement of the exams.
Or, how could we have played antakshari all night in the dark, unable to sleep because of the heat and then doze of sitting in the first bench in the first lecture the next day.
These and many more reasons made luxury too trivial as compared to Hostel’s Heavenly Bliss!

Well, there were 2 of us going from Delhi, 2 coming from Kolkata, 1 from Lucknow and 1 Allahabadi localite. The cavalcade from the capital reached 1st, was greeted by d ‘Lucknow Lad’ at the station –Lucknowi Tehzeeb. Then they spent 2 hours listening to –

~ “The AIRTEL number you are trying to call is currently switched off. Please try again later”.

~ Followed by “Je AIRTEL nomborey apni phone korechen, shetti ae mahodaye baund karachey. Ungraho kore paure apat cheshta karun”,the Bengali translation.
(Pardon the errors in my Bengali writing skills. This happens when you master a language beyond limits :D)

~ Followed by “Jis AIRTEL number pe aap sampark karne ki koshish kar rahe hain wo abhi switched off hai. Kripaya thodi der baad fir try karein”; the Hinglish version.

No, we are not so hopelessly insane to have done this deliberately for 2 hours; we were just trying to contact the 2 ‘Kids from Kolkata’ because there were very high chances of them having eloped. But the misers that they are, they had taken up a corporate cell phone connection which doesn’t have roaming enabled and hence this nonsense.
Finally the Kol Kids arrived and were greeted by huge cheers and hugs and “Pheww!!! Thank God you two didn’t elope. We were half expecting that. Ha Ha Ha.”

And then came the ‘Lovely Localite’. An extremely sweet girl, who was greeted by getting her cheeks pulled (by me who else!). I had missed doing that for a year now, how could I help it.

Well there was another person popularly referred to as ‘Mr. Romeo’. But he did not come. Anybody with even a moderate IQ would have guessed from his name itself as to what was the reason for absence. He He!!!
Just kidding; the guy had (please get ready for the shock of your life) too much of work load and plus he had to come all the way from Pune – 30hours journey
But the Romeo that he was, how could he have forgotten a girl’s birthday: D
So, he compensated his absence by a nice LOOOOOONG phone call.
You asking, who’s birthday????

Well, Read On…………….. : P

13:00 p.m.

Lunch Time.

And people like me don’t know that they are hungry until and unless they look at the clock. Unfortunately those with me were also like me. So, at the stroke of 1 in the afternoon the whole conversation banged in on FOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

Thanks to the lovely localite’s car (Yeah! She came to college in a car), we rushed to our favorite hangout in the so-called main market of HHH. Incidentally, 3rd June happened to be the birth date of one of the Kol Kids. So, this was CELEBRATION TIME!
After having gorged on a huge cake and tones of Chinese junk, I indulged in my ON-OFF love for photography and Handycam videos. Here that meant snaps and recordings of “Happy B’Day to You!”
Well, there was no “Many boyfriends to you…la la la” because the Kol Kid’s boyfriend was the 2nd Kol Kid. Yeah that’s why the thought of the two eloping, you tube light!

We didn’t even feel like leaving the Oh so comfortable air-conditioned restaurant and getting out in the sun because in Allahabad the most insane person also faces stiff competition.
From whom???
From the SUN, who else. You won’t ever see the sun going insane beyond limits except when you are in HHH.

But the thought that only 30 odd hours were left when this ‘AISH’ (as our parents called it) would end, prodded us and we went for a MOVIE.

WARNING: Though this theatre sells a balcony ticket for 50 bucks, please rest assured that it’s ROI=Return on Investment is NIL!
This should have been the sign at the entrance of the theatre but 4 years in HHH had taught us that it will take another 4x4=16 years for the ROI to be 100%. Maybe even more.

The Movie – FANAA - Destroyed in love.
The Theatre – Chanakya

Well nothing was destroyed except our brains, courtesy the faster than tortoise and slower than the tortoise’s brother ceiling fans (Yup, no AC! – Allahabad hai bhai, pankhe se zyada kya expect karte ho?)
Well one year of an AC-PC job had spoiled us all enough to crib our heart out about the theatre’s horrible state and how the ROI would take 4x4x4=64 years to become 100%. One step outside the theatre and we all felt as if we had been instantaneously transported to Antarctica; our thermally tortured faces had forced the nature to take pity on us and the weather had turned genuinely pleasant.
In spite of all the cribbing, one thing which we all enjoyed to our hearts delight was – Whistling (guys)!
Yeah all of us stayed in metros and nobody whistles during a song & dance sequence in a PVR!

19:00 p.m.

The guests were back in the guest-house.
The next POA=Plan of Action was to play LUDO in the canteen. But Alas! the nature had taken more than required pity on us; the rains didn’t stop. As if this weren’t enough there was another surprise in store. Actually a surprise guest – CHULLAD. Now, even I don’t understand as to how that could be a person’s name/nickname but more important than that was the fact that anybody who listened to him for 5 minutes at a stretch would forget what speech is – Indecipherability Personified! Well for us the 5 minutes turned into, I shudder to say, 5 hours. Mummyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!

21:00 p.m.

As I had said earlier, 21:00 p.m. = FOOOOOOOOD!

But please remind yourself, this guest-house doesn’t serve any food to its guests. So, the next best bet was Restaurant – Home Delivery that is; we are all LAZY, don’t forget. At this time restaurants in HHH usually stop taking home delivery orders but we as usual had a way out. Our CALL CENTRE!

I agree we are in IT industry but Puhleeeeeeeeeez, gimme a break; we don’t outsource placing food orders. Call Centre refers to the girl from Delhi who was inseparable from her cell phone and had been a ‘More than regular’ customer for Tandoor restaurant’s home delivery service during her 4 year hostel life in HHH. To an extent that even after a gap of 1 year the restaurant manager recognized her voice when she called “Oh!Aap Nehaji bol rahi hai na? MNR waali? Kahan thi itne din?....................Ohh waise to hum is time order nahi lete par aap special customer hain. Boliye kya kya bhijwaoon.”

Thanks to her, FOOD arrived an hour later and even though we had no utensils; not even spoons; we ATTACKED it.

00:00 a.m.

Time for Chullad to sleep; unfortunately he had decided that it was too late to go back to his relative’s place and had decided to ‘Spend some time with us’. But the little devils that we were, we didn’t even once oppose to his feeling sleepy. :D

Time to PLAY!

Play what? Ludo?

No. DUMB-CHARADES.

And not your everyday Dumb-C, this one was ‘One of a kind’ Dumb-C. What if the cues given to the person to enact are the world’s most DISGUSTING (with a capita ‘D’), self-cooked-up, totally insane mixtures of words? Yeah! That’s precisely what we played and laughed at our own capacities to outwit any Mental Asylum inhabitant. We weren’t exactly sleepy but we were so damn tired laughing that the only thing we could do was sleep.

Lights OFF!

June 4, 2006 –

06:30 a.m.

Even though I had slept for barely 3-4 hours, I just couldn’t sleep anymore. So, I got up and kept roaming here and there like a zombie.

07:30 a.m.

“WAKE up you morons! You haven’t come here to sleep have you?”
All the sleepy-heads sprang up from the bed the way I used to when, on the day of an exam the alarm would ditch me and I would find myself waking up half an hour before the exam; with 4 more chapters left to study.
Yiiiiiiiiiiiikes!

But, Wow! I hadn’t imagined such a prompt response to my wake-up call. After all, I had 4 years work-ex in the field of shouting and waking people up, not just the intended ones but everyone else also in the process.

Breakfast time.
But there was nothing edible that we could call a breakfast. But what the heck, we had LAYs chips and mangoes. Weird combination I know but as we soon found out ‘Hmmm. Not Baaaad. Not bad at all.’
Sitting crossed legged in a circle, eating mangoes – it seemed as if we were all 10 year old kids in our grandma’s house sitting in the veranda with a bucket full of mangoes in the centre. The ‘Lad from Lucknow’ again demonstrated his ‘Tehzeeb’ by peeling off the mangoes so perfectly, it would make any girl feel ashamed (that includes me :P).

The best breakfast I ever had in my life!

10:00 a.m.

Well breakfast was over looooong time back. Since then all we did was decide who will go and have a bath FIRST.
Lazy to the core didn’t I tell you.
As had been expected I was the one to do the honors. The guys were sent to their room to get ready. The ‘Lad from Lucknow’ ACTUALLY got ready in time; my goodness what an oxymoron – Obedient Boy!
The other one; hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Well this Kol kid is one of a kind. We call him Mr. Omniscient because he’s nothing less than a walking talking encyclopedia. But does that mean that when told to get ready quickly, you start watching TV and when an explanation for being late is demanded you say “Oh! I was just enlightening myself with some more ‘trivia’. You know TV is such an important knowledge source.”

And all I could say is “Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm”!

12:00 Noon

The ‘Lovely localite’ was there by the time we got ready. So we packed ourselves in her car as if it were a train’s goods carriage and went to the college canteen to meet ‘PANDITji’. That’s what we call a cook in U.P. giving him due respect for taking care of our clock based appetites. I had half expected that he would ‘TREAT’ us all but alas we again had to pay for the 10 rupee Pepsi and the 5 rupee bread pakora. Guess “hum abhi bhi unke liye bachhe hi the”!
Oh! Sorry sorry. How could I forget? We had the famous ‘Canteen ki Maggi’ also with extra onions sprinkled on top.

This was followed by a tour of the college building.
GOSHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I couldn’t believe my eyes. They had installed a plasma screen TV in the main lobby.
Maaaaaaaaaaan! This place had improved drastically after The President’s visit.
Then we came across the tutorial rooms. I even shudder to count the number of tutorials we had done in those 4 years.
Did you just say “DONE????............ Don’t lie. Say TOPOed”???

Excuse Moi!

As far as I am concerned, I actually DID them. And as far as the others are concerned, well I dare not open my mouth now

Since summer holidays were going on we couldn’t meet any of the teachers. All we did was roam around and reminisce about them when we passed by their rooms.

13:30 p.m.

The ‘Kol Kids’ had their return train at 16:30 p.m. and the ‘cavalcade from the capital’ was supposed to leave at 21:30 p.m. along with the ‘Lad from Lucknow’; so we headed to the main market which was at just a 5 minutes distance from the railway station.
Next Stop = F.R.I.E.N.D.S Café

This was the ‘First Ever’ café to open up in HHH and the whole college junta flocked there like wild pigeons flock together when you throw some seeds for them. Well, a place like HHH does make you realize the worth of Pizza Hut (yummmmmmm) and CCD (yummmmmmm again).

Well the Lovely localite’s birthday was just 3 days later. So, we decided to celebrate it in advance and hence, two of us went to get her a surprise gift. And the lovely girl that she was she decided to give us all a TREAT!

Let the (cold) COFFEE flowwwwwwwwww!

Yeah I know you guys would rather have the word ‘beer’ replace ‘coffee’ but as someone once told me “The presence of girls automatically instills the much needed propriety among guys”

:D

As if we hadn’t proved our insanity yet we indulged in YET ANOTHER round of DUMB-C!
The Mental Asylum type.
In front of everyone!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha………………

Well it wasn’t that bad because even the café owner was enjoying himself. Another ‘weirdo photographs’ session followed and then it was time to see-off the Kol Kids :((

The AISH time was coming to an end. Sob Sob Sob :((

After a Bbye session for the ‘lovely localite’ we headed to the railway station.

16:30 p.m.

"Tataaaaaaaaaaaa!
Bbye!
Take care and for Christ’s sake please inform us when you are back in Kolkata."

We still had a twinkling intuition that these two would elope!
He he he he!

17:00 p.m.

Umang (The Tehzeeb guy aka ‘Lad from Lucknow’), me and Neha (we were the two royal personalities who have been referred to as ‘cavalcade from the capital’ till now) were back in F.R.I.E.N.D.S Café.
Again????

Cummonnnnnnnn, we aren’t hogs that we went there to eat again. Umang was supposed to meet a school buddy of his & this guy was right now posted in HHH in the IAF.

Now at the slight mention of Air Force pilots my eyes light up as if Edison just invented the light bulb!

Can’t help it. This has been the case since the day I saw TOP GUN and hence I expected every IAF pilot to turn out to be Tom Cruise

After a small chat with him the 3 of us headed back to the guest-house to pack up and leave for our train at 21:30 p.m.

18:30 p.m.

“Pachhees rupaye??...........Bhaiyya hum chaar saal se yahan reh rahe hain aur aaj tak kabhi bhi bees rupaye se zyada mein Civil Lines se MNR hostel nahi gaye. Sahi Sahi bolo”

Ah! The good old bargaining skills we had acquired during hostel life were simply PRICELESS

Finally the cycle-rickshaw man was tired of our pestering and agreed. Umang sat alone in one and I and Neha got on the other.

EUREKA!!!

It just struck me that I have a Handycam in my bag. Why not make a video of the whole ride from Civil Lines to the guest-house

Presto! The Handycam was out and recording had started. We even included the Cycle-Rickshaw wale bhaiyya to chip in and keep telling us names of some of the squares we passed on our way. Nothing was planned. It just happened. And am I glad to say the video has turned out extremely well.

Wanna have a look???

Hmmm come and meet me sometime. I’ll show you the whole video in a PVR type ambience. YES, you’ll get POPCORNS too :))

19:00 p.m.

Pack-up time. :((

Within the next one hour the 3 of us freshened up and by 20:00 p.m. we were off to the railway station :((

“Time flies by when you are with people you love”

There couldn’t have been a moment that could better exemplify this adage.

Umang had his train at 23:00 p.m. along with…………… Yiiiiiiiiiiiikes……... Chullad.

Tch tch tch tch…………….

But he was fine with it because he had pledged to bug Chullad beyond all worldly limits.
And I in my mathematical mood I thought ‘Limit tends to Infinity’!

As I write this short sweet narrative of our trip to Allahabad, all the images fly past my eyes as if am watching a movie.

BUT…………..

There is no THE END in this movie.

Because as the train started to move, we didn’t say “Bbye Umang. Take care. Tataaaaaaaaa”

We said “Get back home safely and let us plan out our next meet. And yeah, bug Chullad to the best of your capacities”

A new TRADITION had just taken birth.

And we swore “No matter how busy we are, no matter how khadoos our future HARI SADUs might be, NO MATTER WHAT, we are going to meet up like this once every year. "

"A new place and a new time every year.”

:))

2006-06-26T22:43:00.000-07:00

"I Asked God"

Author - Anonymous

I asked God to take away my pain.
God said, no.
It is no for me to take away, but for you to give it up.
I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.
God said, no.
His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary.
I asked god to grant me patience.
God said, no.
Patience is a by-product of tribulations; it isn’t granted, it is earned.
I asked God to give me happiness.
God said, no.
I give you blessings, happiness is up to you.
I asked God to spare the pain.
God said, no.
Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me.
I asked God to make my spirit grow.
God said, no.
You must grow on your own. But I will prune you to make you fruitful.
I asked for all the things that I might enjoy life.
God said, no.
I will give you life so that you may enjoy all the things.
I asked God to help me love others as much as he loves me.
God said…… Ahhh, at last you have the idea.

This is my favourite poem till date n I'm pretty sure will remain so all my life. More than a poem I love this acts like a "Reality Check" whenever I tend to go overboard, whatever facet of life it may be.
Take a printout and put it up on the wall...............believe me it does work wonders ....... m a living example !!!

2006-05-14T02:56:00.000-07:00

How I Learnt the BARON's WORDLIST ???

Well "Extreme situations call 4 extreme actions".....
One such being d one wen i had to cram a "Wordlist" of 5000 odd words into my "small" brain.........dat too in 1 month flat......
Not dat m bad at english or nething......just dat d peer pressure [wen u see everybody arnd u mugging n blurtin out hi-fi words] took its toll on me durin d days wen i was preparing 4 CAT........

So, wat did i do???......

Read on 2 get a sample of wat i did wid each set of words......

"DESOLATE - DIFFUSE"

Be it "Bollywood" or b it "The Indian Curry".....both r equally famous n both have essentially d same ingredients. A typical Bollywood movie, as it is called, has d following "MASALA" Combinations -

1. There's a destitute family wid a despondent old mother [a widow in max. cases] who's tryin hard 2 make ends meet. Her 2 sons r poles asunder. One is determinate to make his ambitions a reality n make his mother proud, and there's no deterrant dat can deviate him from his decisions. The other son, eventhough dextrous in some field, is desultory and despises hardwork coz he thinks there's no value for it and ends up becoming a desperado. And so d story goes on, wid a dash of romance, melodrama, vice, evil n emotions here n there; and in d end as we all know d 2 brothers unite - d bad one realises his mistakes - and it's a happy family once again.

2. Now lets see d ones in which u have a despot ruling a kingdom. As expected he has a beautiful [ read - drop dead gorgeous ] daughter - the princess; heir to d diadem and d huge riches her father possesses. But hey......where's d hero ????
Well u ppl desperatley need some coaching in hindi cinema here..........
Obviously dat guy is d son of a poor farmer. But yes, he's a person who possesses exceptional dialectical skills and can impress even scholars with his didactic dictums and his ability to explain diffuse manuscripts/scriptures to d common ppl in d village.
Now d -ve element - the king's diabolical minister - who's constantly making devious plans to overthrow d king and take over all d wealth instead of being a minister all his life 2 whon d king wud devolve all his work........
So, while his mind is devising all these machinations, the hero [ needless 2 say ] falls in love wid d princess. And as expected d king cums 2 of thislove story.....then wat????
D princess faces a diatribe from her father n is locked up in d palace. The hero cant stay detached 4m her n so ends up workin in d palace under disguise. In dis period he comes 2 know of d minister's detrimental plans. Now there's a dilemma in his mind - as to whether he shud pursue his love or save d kingdom. Since he's not disaffected like d others he chooses d latter eventhough this spreads false detractions/aspersions against him.
But but but.......
There's got to be a "HAPPILY EVER AFTER" ending......right???
So d king is informed in time by d hero [who puts his own life at gr888 risk] abt d minister's evil plans and d kingdom is saved. And as a reward d king agrees 2 marry his daughter off to d hero :-))

These were just 2 of d numerous "But Obvious" story lines dat our beloved "bollywood" has produced over d years..........
Well d words in d list have ended ..........so all i can say now is.....

THE END !!!!!

2006-04-27T03:23:00.000-07:00

IF.....

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
f you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and DisasterAnd treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spokenTwisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,'
Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

- Rudyard Kipling

This is d credo of my life for now and forever................
Well i guess this reveals another aspect of my personality..................i love readin poems.........so if neone can suggest a gud source (it cud b ur own also)...........do feel free to write it in the comments section :-))